Oh, what wacky segments will the Today show come up with next? This morning, America was treated to a bunch of real women and their real feet with their real problems. And can I just say....eeeeewwwww.
By the way, the title of this post is taken directly from the segment title I woke up to this morning on my TV. I SO wish that I had written that.
Now, I don't know exactly when this happened, but a woman's beauty regime has gone from simple at-home maintenance to a complex and time-intensive laundry list of services, many of which have to be performed at a salon and cost money. Are we working just to keep up with the cost of our grooming? When you consider what your local spa charges, the question does not seem that far out there.
It may have started with the simple mani/pedi. In a less logo'd, less obvious way, the real wave of takeovers in the service industry has not been Starbucks, but rather the nail salon. They are EVERYWHERE. In my little neighborhood alone, there are no less than 12 spas within a span of 3 blocks, with more popping up every day. And they are always filled with women getting their hands and feet worked on while they stare into space and worry about what is happening while they are not at work. Lately, I have been shocked at how many young girls (we are talking 6-12 years old) are in the salons regularly getting their nails polished. Latte-drinking, perfectly groomed young women with iPods and cell phones..who are you? Where are your overalls and your Barbies? Is it possible that you have eluded the awkwardness of puberty? Somehow, JonBenet is not looking so foreign to me any more.
Then there is waxing. The notion of waxing was almost unknown to me and my friends 20 years ago, now it is a regular a part of our routine as brushing our teeth. And it leaves no body part untouched - in fact, the more sensitive the area, the more likely you are going to need to have hot wax poured on it and ripped off. Looking at old pictures of myself, the first thing I notice is my brows. Good god, they look huge! And unkempt! How did I go around like that? Why didn't anyone tell me? Quick, pass me the airbrush and let's clean those things up. I tell you what, in those days, I didn't spend hours in front of the mirror plucking out any stray hair that dared to disturb my model-perfect brow line. On the other hand, I am a believer in the importance of a good brow job. Done well, it really does make your face look younger and dare I say, prettier. It narrows the gap between you and Nicole Kidman, minus several million dollars.
Can I just say, thank god that we didn't take pictures of our Cee U Next Tuesdays in those days or I would surely kill myself. Hello? Is my va-jay-jay in there somewhere?
There is a whole other plethora of services that some women do regularly, some do not. Facials, including microdermabrasion, botox, teeth whitening, body treatments, etc. And of course, there is the hair cut & color maintenance, but that has not really changed over the years, and I don't notice any more or less hair salons than before.
Accepting the fact the being a woman in today's society requires regular visits to your local spa means that you have now commited to both the time and the cost involved. And, my biggest warning is, be careful about the salon you choose. You really do get what you pay for, and the risks associated from going to a 2nd rate spa are not worth the money saved. If you had seen the woman with the nail fungus on the Today Show this morning, you'd be quick to make sure that your spa believes that cleanliness is next to godliness.
So, on that note, I am off to make an appointment to get a pedi today. Because as much as I lament the new demands of today's beauty regime, I always want to to put my best face, I mean foot, forward.
